The 99-Character Name Born from a Poker Bet

Somewhere in New Zealand, there's a man walking around whose full legal name is longer than most tweets. "Full Metal Havok More Sexy N Intelligent Than Spock And All The Superheroes Combined With Frostnova" isn't a rejected Marvel character—it's what happens when you mix poker, alcohol, and New Zealand's surprisingly accommodating name-change laws.

The Bet That Changed Everything

Back in 2009, a poker game among friends took an unexpected turn. The stakes weren't just chips or cash—they involved the ultimate forfeit. When our unnamed hero (well, technically very named hero) lost the hand, he was required to legally change his name to the absurd 99-character monstrosity his friends had concocted.

In his inebriated state, he dutifully filled out the paperwork and submitted it to New Zealand's Department of Internal Affairs. Then, like many drunk decisions, it promptly vanished from his memory.

Five Years of Blissful Ignorance

Here's where the story gets even better. The name change was approved. The government processed it, filed it away, and Full Metal Havok officially became his legal identity. But he had no idea.

For five full years, he went about his life completely unaware that his driver's license, tax records, and every official document bearing his name had been updated to include references to:

• Heavy metal aesthetics
• Superior sexiness
• Intelligence exceeding a Vulcan science officer
• Every superhero ever created
• A World of Warcraft character (Frostnova is a mage spell)

The Passport Problem

The truth finally caught up with him in 2014 when he applied for a passport. Imagine the clerk's face when they pulled up his records. Imagine his face when they told him his legal name wouldn't fit on a standard passport.

"I got a bit of a shock," he told reporters, in what may be the understatement of the decade.

Living With the Consequences

Rather than immediately changing it back, Full Metal Havok has apparently embraced his ridiculous identity. The name does present some practical challenges—most online forms have character limits, and explaining it to bank tellers must get exhausting.

New Zealand's name-change laws are notably relaxed compared to many countries. You can change your name to almost anything, provided it's not offensive, doesn't include numbers or symbols, and isn't unreasonably long. At 99 characters, Mr. Havok apparently just squeaked under whatever the limit is.

A Cautionary Tale?

The story serves as both a warning about drunk decision-making and a testament to following through on ridiculous bets. His friends, who presumably thought the whole thing was hilarious back in 2009, got the last laugh—five years delayed.

For anyone considering a similar stunt: New Zealand's name-change process costs about $170 NZD. Changing it back costs the same. And unlike a bad tattoo, you can't cover this one with a sleeve.