Why Proximity Is the Biggest Predictor of Love

Forget soulmates and destiny. According to decades of psychological research, the single biggest factor in who you fall in love with isn't compatibility, shared interests, or even physical attraction. It's something far more mundane: proximity. The closer someone is to you physically, the more likely you are to develop romantic feelings for them.

This phenomenon, known as the propinquity effect, has been documented since the 1930s and continues to be validated by contemporary research. It's not just about living nearby—it's about the frequency of encounters and the opportunities for interaction that physical closeness creates.

The Evidence Is Overwhelming

In 1932, sociologist James Bossard analyzed 5,000 marriage licenses in Philadelphia and discovered something remarkable: one-third of couples lived within five blocks of each other before marriage. The likelihood of marriage decreased sharply with every additional block of distance.

Fast forward to 1950, when psychologists Leon Festinger, Stanley Schachter, and Kurt Back conducted the famous Westgate studies at MIT. They found that friendships and romantic relationships in student housing were determined largely by physical and functional distance—people became closest with those living nearest to them, even if it was just a matter of which direction their apartment door faced.

More recent studies continue to confirm this pattern. A 2022 study of college students found that seating proximity increased friendship nominations by 3-5 times compared to distant seats. A 2021 randomized experiment in Hungarian schools showed that assigned adjacent seating raised mutual friendship probability from 15% to 22%.

Why Does Proximity Matter So Much?

The propinquity effect works through a psychological mechanism called the mere exposure effect: the more you're exposed to something, the more you tend to like it. Physical proximity increases the frequency of encounters, creating opportunities for interaction. Since most of our daily interactions tend to be neutral or positive, repeated exposure breeds familiarity, comfort, and eventually attraction.

As research published in Frontiers in Psychology in 2025 explained, repeated contact heightens attraction through this mere exposure effect, with geographic closeness providing the foundation for deeper emotional bonds. Even researchers who don't consider proximity the most important factor in long-term relationships concede it's vitally important at the early stages of forming a romantic bond.

A fascinating 2022 study had male participants read lines from a modern musical version of Romeo and Juliet with an unfamiliar woman sitting either 80 centimeters or 150 centimeters away. Those in the closer condition reported liking the woman significantly more afterward. Both men and women reported preferring faces that appeared closer, with the effect being stronger for men less satisfied with their current social relationships.

The Modern Implications

This research has profound implications for how we think about love and relationships. It suggests that:

• Your office colleagues, neighbors, and classmates are statistically more likely to become romantic partners than strangers you meet online or at distant social events
• Long-distance relationships face a significant psychological headwind beyond just logistics
• The design of physical spaces—from college dorms to office layouts—directly influences who forms relationships with whom
• Dating apps that prioritize geographic proximity may be more scientifically sound than those focusing primarily on compatibility algorithms

Of course, proximity alone isn't enough. The effect requires that encounters be at least neutral or positive—if someone repeatedly annoys or antagonizes you, physical closeness will decrease attraction rather than increase it. And proximity works alongside other factors like similarity, physical attractiveness, and reciprocity. But among all the variables that predict romantic love, proximity consistently emerges as one of the most powerful.

So the next time you wonder why you're attracted to your coworker, neighbor, or gym regular, remember: it's not fate. It's geography.